Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)  (Read 2922106 times)

Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1150 on: July 25, 2016, 03:26:40 AM »
When her boyfriend knocked on the door, the blonde greeted him, giggling.
He asked "What's so funny?" she beckoned him in, and went to the kitchen table and pointed to a completed jigsaw puzzle.
She said "I did this in 4 hours!... on the box, it says 5 to 8 Years!"
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1151 on: July 25, 2016, 03:28:29 AM »
A blonde stepped onto a bus with a pig under her arm.
The driver asked "Where did you get that?"
"I won it in a raffle!" answered the pig
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1152 on: July 25, 2016, 03:37:38 AM »
A blonde bought some water skis.

Drove around for months, trying to find a lake with a slope....
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1153 on: July 25, 2016, 03:42:42 AM »
A little old lady wanted to join a biker club.
She knocked on the door of a local biker club and a big, hairy, bearded biker with tattoos all over his arms answered the door.
She proclaimed, "I want to join your biker club."
The guy was amused and told her that she needed to meet certain biker requirements before she was allowed to join.
He asked her, "You have a bike?"
The little old lady said, "Yea, that's my Harley over there," and points to a Harley parked in the driveway.
The biker asked her, "Do you smoke?"
The little old lady said "Yea, I smoke 2 packs of cigarettes a day and a couple of cigars while I'm shooting pool."
The biker is impressed and asked, "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?"
The little old lady said, "Nope, Never... but I've been swung around by my nipples a few times."

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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1154 on: July 25, 2016, 04:06:32 AM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1155 on: July 25, 2016, 08:57:36 AM »
I saw this road sign that said "Watch for Children" and I thought to myself ... That sounds like a fair trade?
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Online STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1156 on: July 25, 2016, 09:06:18 AM »
 :rofl
 

Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1157 on: July 25, 2016, 10:55:07 AM »
That's odd?  We have a faulty cloud overhead.

After all the water fell out, there is this shiny light coming through the hole, and it's almost 11 degrees outside?

Practically a heat wave!

Note that the road and driveway are still damp, as proof that the pic is not photoshopped?



Now, where did I put my sunnies?
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1158 on: July 25, 2016, 01:39:23 PM »
It's impossible here to NOT have rain in a day.. someone found a bucket full of cloud, filled in that hole again, and its leaking once more..

Temp reached 11.1 degrees, but it's dropping again.



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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1159 on: July 25, 2016, 01:45:17 PM »
Just got home from the bike shop (in the rain)... going to retire my 17 year old worn and wonky heated (sometimes) Oxford grips, and replace them with new ones in 3 weeks.  :thumbs
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1160 on: July 25, 2016, 01:47:57 PM »
Spotted a group of 4 Harley riders hiding under a servo shelter, the big wusses! I waved as I rode by, but they ignored me.
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1161 on: July 25, 2016, 02:19:57 PM »
Just to add a little variety, now we have wind gusting 50 to 85 Kph, and hail!

... and thunder... cats are hiding under the bed again. Temp has dropped to 8 degrees

« Last Edit: July 25, 2016, 02:25:40 PM by Kev Murphy »
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1162 on: July 25, 2016, 02:24:47 PM »

3pm Heavy rain. Very windy

6pm Shower. Very windy

9pm Shower. Very windy

12am Shower. Very windy
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1163 on: July 25, 2016, 03:44:51 PM »
All those showers Kev u must be sqeaky clean by now. :Stirpot :Stirpot :Stirpot


3pm Heavy rain. Very windy

6pm Shower. Very windy

9pm Shower. Very windy

12am Shower. Very windy

I'm not strange i'm just not normal {Salvador Dahli}
 
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1164 on: July 25, 2016, 04:04:55 PM »
 :rofl ;-*
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Offline richo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1165 on: July 25, 2016, 06:13:17 PM »
It is not Kev being clean that is the worry but all the wind.  A bit more fibre in the diet may help >:()
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1166 on: July 25, 2016, 06:48:45 PM »
It is not Kev being clean that is the worry but all the wind.  A bit more fibre in the diet may help >:()
Might be too much fibre. :)

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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1167 on: July 25, 2016, 08:27:38 PM »
 :rofl

 Still spitting flurries of rain and hail here, and more wind than an overfed baby... around 10 mm since 9am this morning.
Currently 9 outside, with wind chill factor, 5

More rain expected for the next couple days. Appointment with Surgeon tomorrow, might get a lift to his office
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1168 on: July 25, 2016, 10:13:02 PM »
Kev
I'm waiting on roses from Treloar Roses in Portland and they say it's too wet to dig them. Could you please go out with your umbrella so that they can dig them for me  :popcorn
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1169 on: July 25, 2016, 11:09:06 PM »
Beyond my range at the moment, Treloar are about 6 km north of town, and I am restricted to about 4 metres max distance from the heater  :grin
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1170 on: July 25, 2016, 11:14:53 PM »
I had written him a text
Which I'd sent, hoping the next
Time he came in mobile coverage
He'd have time to say hello.
But I'd heard he'd lost his iPhone,
So I emailed him from my smart phone,
Just addressed, on spec, as follows:
clancy@theoverflow
 

And the answer redirected 
Wasn't quite what I'd expected
And it wasn't from the shearing mate
Who'd answered once before.
His ISP provider wrote it
And verbatim I will quote it:
'This account has been suspended:
You won't hear from him any more.'

In my wild erratic fancy
Visions come to me of Clancy:
Out of reach of mobile coverage
Where the Western rivers flow.
Instead of tapping on the small screen,
He'd be camping by the tall green
River gums, a pleasure
That the town folk never know.

Well, the bush has friends to meet him
But the rest of us can't greet him:
Out there, even Telstra's network
Doesn't give you any bars.
He can't blog the vision splendid
Of the sunlit plains extended
Or tweet the wondrous glory
Of the everlasting stars.

I am sitting at the keyboard,
I'm too stressed out to be bored
As I answer all the emails
By the deadlines they contain.
While my screen fills with promotions
For 'Viagra' and strange potions
And announcements of the million-dollar
Prizes I can claim.

But the looming deadlines haunt me
And their harassing senders taunt me
That they need response this evening
For tomorrow is too late!
But their texts, too quickly ended,
Often can't be comprehended
For their writers have no time to think
They have no time to wait.

And I sometimes rather fancy
That I'd like to trade with Clancy:
Just set up an email bouncer
Saying 'Sorry, had to go.'
While he faced an inbox jamming
Up with deadlines and with spamming
As he signed off every message:
clancy@theoverflow.

Author unknown, received as an email from a friend.
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1171 on: July 26, 2016, 03:45:50 AM »
Beyond my range at the moment, Treloar are about 6 km north of town, and I am restricted to about 4 metres max distance from the heater  :grin

 :fp :think1 :grin :crackup :rofl
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1172 on: July 26, 2016, 04:33:35 AM »
4.30 am, and all is NOT quiet..

Huh?

 Hang on? ... the house next door is presently unoccupied? ....  that bloody Mynah bird is back again!

http://i1029.photobucket.com/albums/y352/kjm47/kjm47/That%20damn%20bird_zpsepojhjdb.mp4
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1173 on: July 26, 2016, 05:04:58 AM »
With age, comes wisdom

The young enthusiastic Bull said to the old Bull..... "Hey! .. lets run down the paddock and crash thru' that fence, and 'service' some of those cows!"

The old Bull replied .. How about we walk over this way, push the gate open, and 'service' ALL them cows?"
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #1174 on: July 26, 2016, 09:33:30 AM »
Gales to batter Victoria again. Winds of up to 130 km/h lashed Victoria late on Monday and similar conditions are forecast on Tuesday.
12 mm rain in past 24 hours

9.30 AM  Portland  5.9°C  yuck!
« Last Edit: July 26, 2016, 09:37:00 AM by Kev Murphy »
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