Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)  (Read 3063421 times)

Offline NTRebel

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12325 on: May 16, 2019, 08:45:59 PM »
I see that the pollies are now doing their bit towards reducing global warming for the next 2 days by keeping their mouths shut.

Not really I just had a phone call from the Prime Monster pity he was 2 weeks too late.
I'm not strange i'm just not normal {Salvador Dahli}
 
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12326 on: May 16, 2019, 10:26:30 PM »
I had to turn my phone off on Tuesday, there were 9 calls that went unanswered, and 4 text messages ignored. (3 from fat Clive)
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12327 on: May 17, 2019, 12:51:23 PM »
Timely warning about tomorrows election.

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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12328 on: May 17, 2019, 01:04:49 PM »
GUTS - Is arriving home late after a night out with the boys, being met by your missus with a broom, and asking: ''Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?''

BALLS - Is coming home late after a night out with the boys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your missus on the bum and then saying: ''You're next, fatty.''


Either action will ensure that you get a comfortable bed and trained nursing staff for the next six weeks while the broken bones heal.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12329 on: May 17, 2019, 01:09:47 PM »
I just read an article on the dangers of heavy drinking...Scared me. So that's it!

After today, no more reading.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12330 on: May 17, 2019, 01:19:30 PM »
The Amazing Aussie Movie Test

 

This simple math test can predict your all time favorite most watched Aussie movie.

Try it without looking at the answers first . It really works! And in only four simple steps;

1: Pick a number from 1 - 9.

2: Multiply that number by 3.

3: Add 3, and then multiply by 3 again. This will result in a two digit number.

4: You will get your answer by adding the two digits together to find your all time favourite movie

5: You now have a one digit number, look the number up in the list below to find your movie;



Your all time favourite most watched Aussie movie is.................


1. Crocodile Dundee, the all time classic love story with Paul Hogan and Linda .

2. Australia, the movie, with Australia's favorite actress Nicole Kidman.

3. Bad Boy Bubbie, strange but interesting movie from Rolf de Heer.

4. Mad Max, where Mel Gibson battles to the death against the bizarre Master Blaster in the Thunderdome.

5. Murielle's Wedding, the adventures of megalomaniac Muriel Heslop mixed with Abba revival.

6. Babe, the adventures of a little piggy that won Oscars and Academy Awards.

7. The Dish, classic Aussie blunder story set in the Aussie outback.

8. Picnic at Hanging Rock, all time classic movie where several schoolgirls disappear without a trace on an outing.

9. The joy of anal sex with male goats & naughty spanking leather clad gay-boy gang bangs.

10. The man from Snowy River, fantastic horsemanship movie with Kirk Douglas, Tom Burlinson and Sigrid Thornton.


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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12331 on: May 17, 2019, 03:15:47 PM »
Sheila: 'What are you doing?'
Bruce: 'Nothing.'
Sheila: 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'
Bruce: 'I was looking for the expiry date.'
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12332 on: May 17, 2019, 03:18:52 PM »
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12333 on: May 17, 2019, 03:32:21 PM »
Fun four hour driving trips near Melbourne ....

St Kilda via Punt Road....
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12334 on: May 17, 2019, 08:46:45 PM »
.. Forget about the good, the bad, and the ugly ...

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12335 on: May 18, 2019, 11:35:23 PM »
Bloke joined a gym to lose weight.
Fantastic results, he lost 8 kilos on the first session!
-Slipped and fell on the jogging machine, and ripped his leg off!
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12336 on: May 19, 2019, 07:25:14 AM »
It's a small world.
So you gotta use your elbows a lot.

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12337 on: May 19, 2019, 11:14:24 AM »
Looks like Labors flight crashed and burned.

Appears that both the Left and Right wings fell off.

... and they lost their pilot.

Labor lost brash Shorten, Libs lost smirking Abbott.

Win, win!
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12338 on: May 19, 2019, 01:02:09 PM »
I don't know who edited it or when but Clive Palmer's wikipedia page says:

Quote
Clive Frederick Palmer (born 26 March 1954) is an Australian loser[6] and national embarrassment.[7] He has iron ore, nickel and coal holdings. In 2016, the BRW magazine "Rich 200" list estimated his wealth at A$600 million.[8]
« Last Edit: May 19, 2019, 03:12:28 PM by Bodø »
 
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12339 on: May 19, 2019, 02:43:12 PM »
Overheard At Jennifer Lopez's Wedding.

"Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today because Jennifer Lopez is apparently trying to break some sort of record"

"Do you, Jennifer Lopez, take ... errm ... I'm sorry, which one are you again?"
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Offline Shillas

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12340 on: May 19, 2019, 02:57:28 PM »
I don't know who edited it or when but Clive Palmer's facebook page says:

Quote
Clive Frederick Palmer (born 26 March 1954) is an Australian loser[6] and national embarrassment.[7] He has iron ore, nickel and coal holdings. In 2016, the BRW magazine "Rich 200" list estimated his wealth at A$600 million.[8]



This is it  :rofl


Shillas :13Candy

CB 125 - long gone
RD 200 - long gone
CB 250T - long gone
XJ 650 - reasonably long gone
XV 750 - reasonably long gone
VN 800 - gone
ST 1100 - recently gone
ST 1300 - In the garage
 
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12341 on: May 19, 2019, 03:02:27 PM »
 :thumbs :thumbsup :thumbs :rofl
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12342 on: May 20, 2019, 01:21:06 AM »
I wonder how long it takes Dollar Bill Shorten to realise he is now worth less than 15 cents?

(Plus Tax)
« Last Edit: May 20, 2019, 05:10:43 AM by Kev Murphy »
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12343 on: May 20, 2019, 05:10:52 AM »
Crazy time of the morning to be inspired by lunacy ...?
Banana growers lament.
23 seconds of your lifetime.

https://youtu.be/3doJt1AinDk
« Last Edit: May 20, 2019, 05:15:58 AM by Kev Murphy »
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12344 on: May 20, 2019, 05:39:12 AM »
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12345 on: May 20, 2019, 08:06:52 AM »
I've known and respected your husband for many years,

and what's good enough for him, is good enough for me.

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12346 on: May 20, 2019, 08:07:53 AM »
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies.

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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12347 on: May 20, 2019, 08:12:46 AM »
Last night it was so cold that the flashers were only describing themselves to passerby.

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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12348 on: May 20, 2019, 08:23:38 AM »
The reason brides wear white is because all kitchen appliances should be matching colours.
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #12349 on: May 20, 2019, 08:31:11 AM »
A woman described herself on Tinder as having an 'Athletic' figure.

Turns out she was flat-chested.
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