Loving Wife
A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns.
Inside, he finds a couple in bed.
He orders the man out of the bed and ties him to a chair.
While tying the home-owner's wife to the bed
the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck,
then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife:
'Listen, this fellow is an escaped convict.
He's probably spent a lot of time in jail
and hasn't seen a woman in years.
I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain...do what ever he tells you.
This man is obviously very dangerous.
If he gets angry, he'll kill us both.
Be strong, honey. I love you!'
His wife responds:
'He wasn't kissing my neck.
He was whispering in my ear.
He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute,
and asked if we had any Vaseline.
I told him it was in the bathroom.
Be strong honey. I love you too.'