OzSTOC

No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: Wild Rose on October 30, 2016, 09:22:19 PM

Title: LEXOPHILIA
Post by: Wild Rose on October 30, 2016, 09:22:19 PM

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LEXOPHILIA - WHO ON EARTH DREAMS THESE Up?

 
A lexophile of course!

•        How does Moses make tea?   Hebrews it.

•        Venison for dinner again?   Oh deer!

 
•        A cartoonist was found dead in his home.  Details are sketchy.

 
•        I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

 
•        Haunted French pancakes give me the crκpes.

 
•        England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

 
•        I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
 
•        They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.
 
•        I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

 
•        Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

 
•        I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.

 
•        I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

 •        This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
 
•        When chemists die, they barium.

 
•        I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.  I just can't put it down.

•        I did a theatrical performance about puns.  It was a play on words.

 
•        Why were the Indians here first?  They had reservations.
 
•        I didn't like my beard at first.  Then it grew on me.
 
•        Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

 
•       When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
 
•       Broken pencils are pointless.
 
•       What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?  A thesaurus.
 
•       I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

•       All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen.  The police have nothing to go on.

 
•       I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
 
•       Velcro - what a rip off!
 
•       Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.

Title: Re: LEXOPHILIA
Post by: NTRebel on October 30, 2016, 10:04:11 PM
Stop it Leo I'm choking on my bourbon. :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl

paul
Title: Re: LEXOPHILIA
Post by: Kev Murphy on October 31, 2016, 01:21:01 AM
 :thumbsup