OzSTOC

No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: StinkyPete on October 30, 2013, 11:26:41 AM

Title: Captain Smithers
Post by: StinkyPete on October 30, 2013, 11:26:41 AM
In the greatest days of the British Empire, a new commanding officer was sent to a jungle outpost to relieve the retiring colonel.
 
After welcoming his replacement and showing the courtesies (gin and tonic, cucumber sandwiches) that protocol decrees, the retiring colonel said,
"You must meet Captain Smithers, my right-hand man, God, he's really the strength of this office.  His talent is simply boundless."
 
Smithers was summoned and introduced to the new CO, who was surprised to meet a toothless, hairless, scabbed and pockmarked specimen of humanity, a particularly unattractive man less than three foot tall.
"Smithers, old man, tell your new CO about yourself."
"Well, sir, I graduated with honours from Sandhurst, joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines.
I've represented Great Britain in equestrian events and won a Silver Medal in the middleweight division of the Olympics. I have researched the history of..."
Here the colonel interrupted, "Yes, yes, never mind that Smithers, the CO can find all that in your file. Tell him about the day you told the witch doctor to get f@#%ed."
Title: Re: Captain Smithers
Post by: Whizz on October 30, 2013, 11:58:22 AM
 :crackup :rofl :rofl :crackup :rofl

 :-++ :-++
Title: Re: Captain Smithers
Post by: Biggles on October 30, 2013, 12:25:51 PM
 :thumbsup
Oh yes.  One really must be careful whom one insults, especially at this time of the year.
Title: Re: Captain Smithers
Post by: Wild Rose on October 30, 2013, 03:02:25 PM
:thumbsup
Oh yes.  One really must be careful whom one insults, especially at this time of the year.
:thumb :thumb So true
Title: Re: Captain Smithers
Post by: JuST Peter on October 30, 2013, 06:19:15 PM
A new joke  :crackup :crackup :crackup :crackup :rofl :rofl :rofl
Title: Re: Captain Smithers
Post by: Pocket STocker on October 30, 2013, 07:28:42 PM
He he he  :thumbsup


Pockey  :wink1