OzSTOC

No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: Kev on January 10, 2014, 05:54:37 PM

Title: When God created Police Officers
Post by: Kev on January 10, 2014, 05:54:37 PM
When the Lord was creating Police Officers, He was into his sixth day of overtime when an Angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one Lord?"

And the Lord said, "Have you read the specification on this order? A Police Officer has to be able to run five miles through alleys in the dark, scale walls, enter homes the health inspector wouldn't touch, and all the while, not wrinkle his uniform."

"He has to be able to sit in an unmarked car all day on surveillance, guard a murder scene that night, canvass the neighbourhood for witnesses, and still testify in court the next day."

"He has to be in good physical condition at all times, running on coffee and half-eaten meals. And he's meant to have six pairs of hands."

The Angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands...no way."

"It's not the hands that are causing me problems," said the Lord, "it's the three pairs of eyes a Police Officer has to have."

"That's on the standard model?" asked the Angel.

The Lord nodded.

"One pair that sees through a pocket before he asks, May I see what's in there, Sir?" - when he already knows and wishes he'd taken that accounting job. "Another pair here in the back of his head for his partner's safety. And another pair of eyes here in front that can look reassuringly at a bleeding victim and say, "You'll be all right," when he knows it isn't so."

"Lord," said the Angel, touching his sleeve, "rest and work on this tomorrow."

"I can't," said the Lord, "I already have a model that can talk a large, out of control drunk into a patrol car without incident - and feed a family of five on a civil service pay cheque."

The Angel circled the model of the police officer very slowly. "Can it think?" she asked.

"You bet," said the Lord. "It can tell you the elements of a hundred different crimes; recite the Caution in its sleep; detain, investigate, search, and arrest a violent thug on the street in less time than it takes five learned judges to debate the legality of the stop... and still keeps its sense of humour."

"This Officer also has phenomenal personal control. He can deal with crime scenes that you'd find painted in hell, coax a confession from a child abuser, comfort a murder victim's family, and then read in the daily paper how Law Enforcement isn't sensitive to the Rights of criminal suspects."

Finally, the Angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the Police Officer. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I did say that You were trying to put too much into this model."

"That's not a leak," said the Lord, "it's a tear."

"What's the tear for?" asked the Angel.

"It's for bottled-up emotions, for fallen colleagues, for commitment to the Crown, and for Justice."

"You're a genius," said the Angel.

The Lord looked somber. "I didn't put it there," he said.
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: HunterTodd on January 10, 2014, 06:36:52 PM
Thanks for that.

It is easy to be down on the police particularly when they pull us up for things we consdier trivial. But they are the ones who see the car wrecks and they are the ones who knock on the doors of parents to tell them their child has just been killed.

If I had to do that I would probably just as uncompromising.

Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: Biggles on January 10, 2014, 06:42:07 PM
Serious thoughts well put together.  Good to be reminded of the human aspect.
It's the few who are on a power trip who get ordinary folk offside.
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: StinkyPete on January 10, 2014, 09:14:06 PM
Well said Kev.  I had too many colleagues who succumbed to the difficulties of policing,  with mental illness and even suicide.   
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: tj189 on January 11, 2014, 07:06:27 AM
Thank you for sharing Kev  :thumb
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: Shiney on January 11, 2014, 07:59:27 AM
 :-++ :-++ :-++
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: JuST Peter on January 11, 2014, 07:28:57 PM
Some very sobering thoughts from this Kev. As has been said, it's good to remember there's an ordinary human inside the uniform   :clap :clap
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: gaz on January 12, 2014, 07:40:22 AM
:-++ :-++ :-++

 :eek :eek :eek
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: Diesel on January 13, 2014, 03:35:05 PM
Nicely put Kev - thanks for sharing.       :cop         :thumb

Cheers, Diesel
Title: Re: When God created Police Officers
Post by: Streak on January 13, 2014, 03:58:22 PM
Could not agree more Kev, thanks for putting this up, for all the bad press going around, we do forget they face all the things that we dont want to.

hats of to them.