OzSTOC
No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: WendyL on August 04, 2014, 10:28:43 PM
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I came out of the chip shop with a meat/potato pie, large chips, mushy peas and a jumbo sausage.
A poor homeless man, sitting there, said, “I've not eaten for two days.”
I said to him, “I wish I had your willpower!”
I took my biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells.
Apparently, "young blacks" and "Romanian gypsies" were not the correct answers.
A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunch time today. She said, “Sorry about the wait.”
I said, “Don't worry my dear.. You might lose it eventually.”
An Irish boy stood crying at the side of the road. A man asked him, “What's wrong?”
The boy said, “Me ma is dead.”
“Oh bejaysus," the man said. “Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?”
The boy said, no tanks mister, sex is the last ting on my mind at the moment.”
Years ago, it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away, but since all the doctors are now muslims, I've found a bacon sandwich works much better !
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such an immensely fast shutter-speed, that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth shut.
I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you could look at an unattended bag on a bus or train and think to yourself, "I'm gonna take that!"
A man in a hot air balloon was lost over Ireland. He looked down and saw a farmer in the fields and shouted down to him, “Where am I ?”
The Irish farmer looked back up and shouted back, "You can't fool me. You're in that basket up there."
I had this trivia competition in the bag until the very last question, which I got wrong. The question was, "Where do women have the curliest hair ?"
Apparently the correct answer was Fiji.
A fat woman had a medical at the doctors, he told her, your are grossly overweight, she said, I want a second opinion, he said, O.K. you're bloody ugly as well.
That should more or less cover it all ........
:fp :fp :fp
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:dred11
:rofl :rofl :rofl :crackup :crackup
THANX wENDY.. :crackup
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Wendy's back............. :crackup
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Didya miss me???? ;-*
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:beer
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Come back Peter and Dave... All is forgiven :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :o :o :o
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Wendy !
Good to have you back :hatwave
:beer
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:fp :spank ++
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Come back Peter and Dave... All is forgiven :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[ :o :o :o
:hatwave :runyay :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
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I'm suitably offended. Thanks for the chuckle.
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AWESOME :thumbs
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Offend me , not a chance, bring it on..................................nice........................ :wht11
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Well done. Hard to keep from laughing in bed reading that.
Sent from my GT-I9507 using Tapatalk
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:thumbs :thumbsup :thumbs :thumbsup :thumbs :thumbsup :thumbs :thumbsup :hatwave