OzSTOC

No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: Williamson on September 01, 2014, 09:05:01 PM

Title: What's a railway tie?
Post by: Williamson on September 01, 2014, 09:05:01 PM
Two guys are walking through the woods and come across this big deep hole.

"Wow...that looks deep." "Sure does... toss a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is."

They pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait... no noise.

"Jeeez. That is REALLY deep... here.. throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise."

They pick up a couple football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait... and wait. Nothing.

They look at each other in amazement. One gets a determined look on his face and says, "Hey...over here in the weeds, there's a railroad tie. Help me carry it over here. When we toss THAT sucker in, it's GOTTA make some noise."

The two drag the heavy tie over to the hole and heave it in. Not a sound comes from the hole.

Suddenly, out of the nearby woods, a goat appears, running like the wind. It rushes toward the two men, then right past them, running as fast as it's legs will carry it. Suddenly it leaps in the air and into the hole.

The two men are astonished with what they've just seen...

Then, out of the woods comes a farmer who spots the men and ambles over.

"Hey... you two guys seen my goat out here?"

"You bet we did! Craziest thing I ever seen! It came running like crazy and just jumped into this hole!"

"Nah", says the farmer, "That couldn't have been MY goat. My goat was chained to a railroad tie."
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: Shiney on September 01, 2014, 09:06:42 PM
 :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: Biggles on September 01, 2014, 09:39:42 PM
 :grin
A goodie that stands the test of time.   :thumb

In Oz we call them "sleepers".
The Yanks recognise the fact they "tie" the rails at the right distance apart.
I like "sleepers".
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: JuST Peter on September 02, 2014, 03:51:13 PM
So the farmer's goat also becomes a sleeper  :crackup :crackup :crackup
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: Pocket STocker on September 02, 2014, 04:50:44 PM
Oops!!!!   :rofl  :rofl  :rofl

Pockey  :grin
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: WendyL on September 02, 2014, 08:27:35 PM
Hehehehe
 :crackup :crackup :crackup
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: alans1100 on September 03, 2014, 12:32:24 AM
:grin
A goodie that stands the test of time.   :thumb

In Oz we call them "sleepers".
The Yanks recognise the fact they "tie" the rails at the right distance apart.
I like "sleepers".

Sleepers don't actually do anything but sit on the gravel bed and support the rail. Before concrete sleepers and until near the end of wooden sleepers they used dog spikes to hold the rail on to the sleeper
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: StinkyPete on September 03, 2014, 08:06:56 AM
For this and other great Aussie jokes, search on YouTube for "King Billy Cokebottle"    Your will find plenty of gems to keep you amused, and if political correctness is high on your agenda, go search for something else.   :crackup
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: HOFFY on September 03, 2014, 12:02:29 PM
For this and other great Aussie jokes, search on YouTube for "King Billy Cokebottle"    Your will find plenty of gems to keep you amused, and if political correctness is high on your agenda, go search for something else.   :crackup

Pete;

I thought I was the only one who knew about Billy Cokebottle.

There was a segment on a local radio station in Perth a number of years ago that had the bloke who played Billy. He was actually an Italian but gave the accent which sounded like an Australian Aboriginal.

If you listen to the original jokes and see the original "cassette" there is no mention or displaying of pictures of any Australian Aboriginals, The listener created their own image of the group portrayed. Caused a bit of a debate back then.

Wife bought a CD a few years ago and I still get a huge laugh from the jokes.   
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: Streak on September 03, 2014, 03:22:57 PM
For this and other great Aussie jokes, search on YouTube for "King Billy Cokebottle"    Your will find plenty of gems to keep you amused, and if political correctness is high on your agenda, go search for something else.   :crackup

Pete;

I thought I was the only one who knew about Billy Cokebottle.

There was a segment on a local radio station in Perth a number of years ago that had the bloke who played Billy. He was actually an Italian but gave the accent which sounded like an Australian Aboriginal.

If you listen to the original jokes and see the original "cassette" there is no mention or displaying of pictures of any Australian Aboriginals, The listener created their own image of the group portrayed. Caused a bit of a debate back then.

Wife bought a CD a few years ago and I still get a huge laugh from the jokes.

Morton!
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: JuST Peter on September 04, 2014, 07:31:14 PM
For this and other great Aussie jokes, search on YouTube for "King Billy Cokebottle"    Your will find plenty of gems to keep you amused, and if political correctness is high on your agenda, go search for something else.   :crackup


Pete;

I thought I was the only one who knew about Billy Cokebottle.

There was a segment on a local radio station in Perth a number of years ago that had the bloke who played Billy. He was actually an Italian but gave the accent which sounded like an Australian Aboriginal.

If you listen to the original jokes and see the original "cassette" there is no mention or displaying of pictures of any Australian Aboriginals, The listener created their own image of the group portrayed. Caused a bit of a debate back then.

Wife bought a CD a few years ago and I still get a huge laugh from the jokes.


Morton!

King Billy Coke Bottle Pet Mud Crab (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAOq99LdsoY#)
Title: Re: What's a railway tie?
Post by: Shiney on September 04, 2014, 09:43:06 PM
 :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl

That was a good one :thumbsup