OzSTOC

No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: alans1100 on November 11, 2014, 06:44:29 PM

Title: Australian Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!!
Post by: alans1100 on November 11, 2014, 06:44:29 PM
LOGON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter

LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie.

MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie.

DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the ute.

HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies.

KEYBOARD: Where you hang the ute keys.

WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold.

SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season..

BYTE: What mozzies do

MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do.

CHIP: A pub snack.

MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips.

MODEM: What you did to the lawns.

LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps.

SOFTWARE: Plastic knives and forks you get at Red Rooster.

HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives and forks - from K-Mart.

MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed.

MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up.

WEB: What spiders make.

WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the verandah.

SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the ute won't go.

CURSOR: What you say when the ute won't go.

YAHOO: What you say when the ute does go.

UPGRADE: A steep hill.

SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.

MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.

USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things.

NETWORK:What you do when you need to repair the fishing net.

INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go.

NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover a hole in the net.

ONLINE: Where you hang the washing.

OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough
Title: Re: Australian Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!!
Post by: Kev Murphy on November 11, 2014, 07:31:54 PM
BROADBAND: That chick that's not allowed back in the bar for two months. :grin
Title: Re: Australian Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!!
Post by: Biggles on November 11, 2014, 09:07:33 PM
Shouldn't you blokes be out riding???

Or changing the oil??

Or polishing the dustcaps?
Title: Re: Australian Computer Terminology - Getting ready for Broadband in the bush!!
Post by: Kev Murphy on November 11, 2014, 09:26:14 PM
But... It's dark out there.... no... that's another joke...