OzSTOC
No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: WendyL on April 15, 2015, 04:04:22 PM
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A government survey has shown that 91% of immigrants come to
Australia & Britain so that they can see their own doctor.
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Due to the current economic crisis, Greece is cancelling all production
of humus and taramasalata. It's a double dip recession.
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Sixty Pakistanis died in Sydney this morning.
It was not a terrorist attack, a bunk bed collapsed..
The police are blaming AL IKEA .
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Police stop a Pakistani in his transit van on the motorway. Policeman
says "Do you know the limit is 100?"
The driver leans into the back and says: "Hear that, three of you
have got to get out!"
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Paddy & Mick stagger out of the zoo with blood pouring from them..
"Bollocks to that" said Paddy "That's the last time I go lion dancing"
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Paddy says to Mick, "Christmas is on Friday this year".
Mick said, "Let's hope it's not the 13th then."
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My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 15 hours to
hoover the house. Turns out she was a Slovak.
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Since the snow came, all the wife has done is look longingly through the
window. If it gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.
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I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be
honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
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Two women called at my door and asked what bread I ate. When I said
white, they gave me a lecture on the benefits of brown bread for 30
minutes. I think they were those Hovis Witnesses.
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Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after
they tested positive for WD40.
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A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt .
Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Rocher.
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Just a reminder to those who stole electrical goods in last year's
riots: your one year manufacturer's warranty runs out soon.
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Two Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.
Both are in hospital. One's in a korma, the other's got a dodgy tikka!
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In the first few days of the last Olympics, Romanians took gold,
silver, bronze, copper & lead.
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The sailing results are in: USA took gold, GB took silver and Somalia
took a Middle aged couple from Singapore .
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An entrepreneur has started his own business in Afghanistan
making Land Mines that look like prayer mats!
It's doing well. Prophets are going through the roof.
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A boy asks his granny, 'Have you seen my pills, they were labelled LSD?'
Granny replies, ‘Never mind the pills, have you seen the dragons in the
kitchen’?
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An elderly couple are in church. About halfway through the service,
the wife leans over and says to her husband, 'I just let out a silent
fart; what do you think I should do?' He replies, 'Put a new battery in your hearing aid’.
:rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup
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:thumbs :-((( :crackup :rofl
Fantastic .
:blu13
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:rofl :crackup
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:clap :clap :clap :crackup :crackup :crackup :rofl :rofl :rofl :like
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Dont encourage her.
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:dred11
:crackup :fp :rofl :beer
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awww... don't be too hard, Brock... theres some gooduns' in there! :nahnah :rofl
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Yeah, leave her alone ya big bully ;-*
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Dont encourage her.
But Bock, I've been good and quiet for ages.....
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Dont encourage her.
But Bock, I've been good and quiet for ages.....
(http://i1308.photobucket.com/albums/s616/_gregorypb/f499dfd7163346d49cc63fadce1d1dcd_zpsf1d42b1b.jpg)
NuckNuckNuck - Buzzingah!
BTW it's not Bock - it's Block, hangon - it's Broke, no? Howbout Bocchi?, no? Wadabout Bonk?, no? Igivup :( ;)
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dry season must be on the way is it keep it up Wendy I need a good laugh
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3. Content. Keep it clean. Foul language, Nudity, Racism or other such nonsense will be deleted without prior warning. Users may receive a private warning after the fact to not repeat such inappropriate postings. if you keep doing after we ask you not to will result in actions being taken against the offending user. If you would not want your Children or Grand Children reading it, then it does not belong here. We are all adults here.
I did enjoy the WD40 one. :D
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:crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl :crackup :rofl
Awesome :clap :clap :clap
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3. Content. Keep it clean. Foul language, Nudity, Racism or other such nonsense will be deleted without prior warning. Users may receive a private warning after the fact to not repeat such inappropriate postings. if you keep doing after we ask you not to will result in actions being taken against the offending user. If you would not want your Children or Grand Children reading it, then it does not belong here. We are all adults here.
I did enjoy the WD40 one. :D
If Brock (Bock) gets too offended, I'll just get Blue Owl to post my funnies, with her being my 14yo daughter and all..... ;-*
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3. Content. Keep it clean. Foul language, Nudity, Racism or other such nonsense will be deleted without prior warning. Users may receive a private warning after the fact to not repeat such inappropriate postings. if you keep doing after we ask you not to will result in actions being taken against the offending user. If you would not want your Children or Grand Children reading it, then it does not belong here. We are all adults here.
I did enjoy the WD40 one. :D
If Brock (Bock) gets too offended, I'll just get Blue Owl to post my funnies, with her being my 14yo daughter and all..... ;-*
Loophole located :grin
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Dont you worry, if it offends me then its bad, and then the really big stick comes out :spank
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Dont you worry, if it offends me then its bad, and then the really big stick comes out :spank
But that would be child abuse if it was Blue Owl who posted....
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Dont you worry, if it offends me then its bad, and then the really big stick comes out :spank
But that would be child abuse if it was Blue Owl who posted....
Not when it's applied at the seat of the problem.
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Some crackups in there WendyL ....
:crackup :crackup :crackup :crackup :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
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Blue.......owl! Blue.......owl! Blue.....owl!
COME ON IN BLUE OWL!!! o:)
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Hmmmmm . . .
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Blue.......owl! Blue.......owl! Blue.....owl!
COME ON IN BLUE OWL!!! o:)
She's busy playing hockey and spending all my money at the moment gets back to Darwin tomorrow.
She did take a selfie wearing her Ozstoc beanie though, with the Gold Coast being so cold and all
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:dred11
Hmmmmm . . .
I'm STealing :law that pic STroppy. :thumb :grin
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:dred11
Hmmmmm . . .
I'm STealing :law that pic STroppy. :thumb :grin
You're welcome John . . Like pretty much all funnies on the forum, it was nicked from another and so on . .