OzSTOC
No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: Wild Rose on June 30, 2015, 05:20:26 PM
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The following questions were set in last year's GED examination .
These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)
Q. Name the four seasons
A.. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q. How is dew formed ?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on ?
A.. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed.
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections ?
A.. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.
Q. What are steroids ?
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs ..
(Shoot yourself now , there is little hope)
Q... What happens to your body as you age ?
A.. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty ?
A.. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
(So true)
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A.. Premature death.
Q. What is artificial insemination ?
A... When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.s
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour ?
A.. Keep it in the cow.
(Simple, but brilliant)
Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. The abdomen) ?
A.. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U (wtf!)
Q. What is the fibula ?
A.. A small lie.
Q. What does 'varicose' mean ?
A.. Nearby.
Q. What is the most common form of birth control ?
A.. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A.. The caesarean section is a district in Rome .
Q. What is a seizure ?
A.. A Roman Emperor.
(Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)
Q. What is a terminal illness ?
A. When you are sick at the airport.
( Irrefutable)
Q. What does the word ' benign' mean ?
A.. Benign is what you will be after you be eight .
(brilliant) .
Q. What is a turbine ?
A.. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head. Once an Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his nappy and wraps it around his head.
Soon they will vote...!
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:rofl
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:rofl :rofl :rofl :like :-++ :-++ :-++
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Careful Leo. I have a heart condition. :rofl Some good ones in there.
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that made my morning :crackup
Work will be a lot easier today :-)
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In not too many years, these people will be educating our grandchildren and running our country. :fp
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:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :crackup :crackup :crackup :crackup :crackup
Leo, you've outdone yourself, and cracked me up more than once….well done!
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:rofl :rofl :rofl
:like