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No Parking Zone! => Off Topic, Off Colour, and non-motorcycle related => Topic started by: Wild Rose on September 09, 2015, 05:57:56 AM

Title: Precise Mathematics
Post by: Wild Rose on September 09, 2015, 05:57:56 AM
   Mathematics:

This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. experience.
It has an indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint..it goes like this:

What Makes 100%?

What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But ,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.

 
Now you know why some people are where they are!


 
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: WendyL on September 09, 2015, 08:54:38 AM
Gotta hand it to those maths teachers.... :-++ :-++ :-++ :-++
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: StinkyPete on September 09, 2015, 09:07:18 AM
It's an "Oldy but a Goody" and as well as proof that 2=1, is proof that mathematicians are weirdos.....   
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: PC on September 09, 2015, 06:37:30 PM
         Three mates each gave me $10  to buy them a bottle of rum  I got the rum on special for $25         I couldn't  divide the $5  evenly
                            so I gave each them $1 back and kept $2
   Now here is my problem     $9 x 3 = $27
                                          + my $2 = $29

            So where hell did the other $1 go ?

   Peter
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: Shaun on September 09, 2015, 08:51:03 PM
It's an "Oldy but a Goody" and as well as proof that 2=1, is proof that mathematicians are weirdos.....
No, it just proves that people who want to divide things by 0 are weirdos...

if a=b, then dividing by (a-b) is the same as dividing by 0, which is undefined. Try it on your calculator and see for yourself.

Try again. :D
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: Shaun on September 09, 2015, 08:59:37 PM
         Three mates each gave me $10  to buy them a bottle of rum  I got the rum on special for $25         I couldn't  divide the $5  evenly
                            so I gave each them $1 back and kept $2
   Now here is my problem     $9 x 3 = $27
                                          + my $2 = $29

            So where hell did the other $1 go ?

   Peter
You are mixing cost and payment with your $9x3 and the $2. Think of it another way, that doesn't mix it up.

The shop received $30 from you and gave you $5 back to return to your mates. $30 - $5 = $25. $3 is given to your mates and you keep $2. $3 + $2 = $5 , and the other $25 that the bottlo now has gives you the total of $30. No missing dollar.
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: Tipsy on September 10, 2015, 02:42:20 PM
Dont care about the $1, $2 or $5 .  where the F#%& is the rum I am tungin for a drink.

T & T
Title: Re: Precise Mathematics
Post by: PC on September 10, 2015, 06:25:34 PM
Dont care about the $1, $2 or $5 .  where the F#%& is the rum I am tungin for a drink.

T & T
Sorry mate  we got so thirsty running around looking for the other dollar we drank it  :beer

  Peter