Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one guy says to the other, “You know, whenever I go home after we’ve been out drinking, I turn off the headlights before I get to the driveway, I shut off the engine and coast into the garage, I take my shoes off before I enter the house, sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed veeeeery slowly… and my wife STILL wakes ...up and yells at me for staying out so late!”
His buddy looks at him and says, “Well, you’re obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, toss my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wife’s ass and say, ‘How about a blow job?’ ….and she’s always sound asleep.”