Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 4158936 times)

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7700 on:** June 02, 2018, 07:29:50 PM »

She said she wanted to walk down the aisle with me,

... so I took her grocery shopping.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7701 on:** June 02, 2018, 07:49:06 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7702 on:** June 02, 2018, 07:52:29 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7703 on:** June 02, 2018, 08:08:16 PM »

"Hey Honey? .. can you smell bacon cooking?"

"Nope?"

"Neither can I, .. get in the kitchen and make it happen!"

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7704 on:** June 03, 2018, 02:54:09 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7705 on:** June 03, 2018, 03:20:00 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7706 on:** June 03, 2018, 06:49:30 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7707 on:** June 03, 2018, 07:02:07 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7708 on:** June 03, 2018, 10:34:08 AM »

Chuck Norris never flushes the toilet.

He just scares the crap out of it.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7709 on:** June 03, 2018, 10:41:04 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7710 on:** June 03, 2018, 10:54:42 AM »

I believe that it would be more prudent to change the locks, than to give a Politician the keys to the city.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7711 on:** June 03, 2018, 11:05:43 AM »

Paddy said to Mick: "I can't remember the name of that historical Greek film that Brad Pitt starred in."

"Troy." said Mick.

Paddy: "I feckin' am, but I still can't remember it?"

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7712 on:** June 03, 2018, 11:33:16 AM »

In Disguise.

Best place to look for the Big Dipper and the Moon.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7713 on:** June 03, 2018, 11:34:38 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7714 on:** June 03, 2018, 09:18:47 PM »

The older you get, the more you need to keep a fire extinguisher close to the cake.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7715 on:** June 03, 2018, 09:20:51 PM »

I saw a sign that said "Watch for children" and I thought, sounds like a fair trade?

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7716 on:** June 03, 2018, 09:22:54 PM »

A woman said to the dentist "I don't know which is worse ... having a tooth pulled, or having a Baby."
The dentist replied "Well make up your mind ... I gotta adjust the chair!"

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7717 on:** June 03, 2018, 09:29:32 PM »

Wifi went down during family dinner tonight.

One kid started talking and I dunno who he is?

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7718 on:** June 05, 2018, 09:15:32 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7719 on:** June 05, 2018, 09:30:23 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7720 on:** June 05, 2018, 02:49:33 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7721 on:** June 05, 2018, 04:48:10 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7722 on:** June 05, 2018, 05:11:43 PM »

Saw a guy wearing a tee shirt today with the acronym 'MILF' in large letters on it.

When he was closer, I could read the small print underneath.

It said 'Man I Love Fishing!'

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7723 on:** June 05, 2018, 07:17:20 PM »

Trump says that nobody will be a better President than him.

He's right!

Having nobody as president would be far better...

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7724 on:** June 05, 2018, 07:30:21 PM »

News:

Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 4158936 times)