Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)  (Read 4158692 times)

Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7650 on: May 29, 2018, 03:05:30 AM »
I went out drinking on St Patricks Day, so I left my bike in the car park at the pub, and took a bus home...

That may not be a big deal to you, but I've never driven a bus before.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7651 on: May 29, 2018, 03:14:09 AM »
Temples are free to enter but still empty.

Pubs charge to enter, but are full.

Why do people ignore inner peace & choose to pay for self destruction?
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7652 on: May 29, 2018, 03:18:03 AM »
To this day, the boy that used to bully me at school still takes my lunch money?

On the plus side, he makes pretty good Subway sandwiches and shakes.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7653 on: May 29, 2018, 03:22:59 AM »
My missus said that if I don't get off the computer and go cut the lawn, she'll slam my head on the keyboard,
but I think she's jokinfjreoiwjrtwe4to8rkljreun8f4ny84c8y4t58lym4wthylmhawt4mylt4amlathnatyn
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7654 on: May 29, 2018, 03:26:07 AM »
Diplomacy is the act of remembering her birthday, but not her age.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7655 on: May 29, 2018, 04:19:03 AM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7656 on: May 29, 2018, 12:42:15 PM »
Blonde takes her son to the Doctor "He swallowed my house key!" she said.

Doc asked "When did this happen?"

"About ten days ago."

"Why did you leave it so long before bringing him to me?"

"Well, I had a duplicate, but I misplaced it this morning."
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7657 on: May 29, 2018, 12:52:33 PM »
Where did the terrorist go after he detonated his bomb?


... Everywhere.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7658 on: May 29, 2018, 01:03:47 PM »
I have decided to grow my own food.

Can anyone tell me where I can purchase bacon seeds?
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7659 on: May 29, 2018, 01:18:21 PM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7660 on: May 29, 2018, 02:41:06 PM »
Here is todays giggle for you... created just a few minutes ago...

https://youtu.be/i5vAsg4Gmig
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7661 on: May 29, 2018, 04:11:15 PM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7662 on: May 29, 2018, 04:12:06 PM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7663 on: May 29, 2018, 04:22:08 PM »
When the Beatles released 'Lucy in the sky with diamonds' I had a friend who misheard the lyrics.
He used to sing "The girl with colitis goes by" instead of "The girl with Kaleidoscope eyes"

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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7664 on: May 30, 2018, 05:05:00 AM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7665 on: May 30, 2018, 05:05:25 AM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7666 on: May 30, 2018, 05:11:35 AM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7667 on: May 30, 2018, 05:16:00 AM »
Teacher "Johnny, if you had ten chocolate biscuits, and 3 friends asked you for one each,
how many would you have left?"

Johnny "TEN!"
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7668 on: May 30, 2018, 09:57:19 AM »
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7669 on: May 30, 2018, 01:12:14 PM »
Our weather forecast here for today, is for 'passing' showers.

After looking out the window at the misery outside, I would replace the letter 'a' in the word with the letter 'i'.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7670 on: May 30, 2018, 01:30:37 PM »
Received an email from Woolworths, listing my 'personalised' items which are currently on special offer, based on my non-existent 'recent search' ??
WHAT search?

Of the 20 items listed, I have never in my entire life purchased any of them?

E.G.: When I wash my hands, I use soap. I have no use for some overpriced, unheard-of brand of 'eco-friendly, organic, low-fat, genetically-modified, gluten-free, anti-bacterial, low-sugar, high-protein hand cleaner.
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7671 on: May 30, 2018, 06:18:19 PM »
  :rofl :crackup
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7672 on: May 31, 2018, 12:20:59 PM »
There is a Google camera vehicle driving around Portland at the moment, updating street view.
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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7673 on: May 31, 2018, 12:58:19 PM »
There is a Google camera vehicle driving around Portland at the moment, updating street view.

I got snapped by one on my Queensland trip last year.  I keep checking but as yet is not updated.
 
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Online Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #7674 on: May 31, 2018, 01:06:10 PM »
Our current street view images are dated Jan 2010 .. still shows my now non existent work van parked outside my flat.



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