Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 5861480 times)

Bodø Glimt · « **Reply #7751 on:** June 09, 2018, 12:53:55 PM »

I bit like convincing your partner you're a virgin and are carrying the son of god.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7752 on:** June 09, 2018, 12:55:30 PM »

Yeah, but there are millions who still believe that one.

ppopeye · « **Reply #7753 on:** June 09, 2018, 05:07:39 PM »

Millions and millions. And more every day.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7754 on:** June 09, 2018, 09:38:33 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7755 on:** June 10, 2018, 07:30:35 AM »

If you cross the Godfather with a lawyer, you get an offer that you can't understand.

Bodø Glimt · « **Reply #7756 on:** June 10, 2018, 11:00:59 AM »

What is it when people say things like "put your hands in the air just like you don't care"? Surely if you don't care you couldn't be arsed doing it.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7757 on:** June 10, 2018, 05:09:30 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7758 on:** June 10, 2018, 07:23:11 PM »

Another 'blast from the past'

In the army, we used to joke about wearing a pair of "fresh" sox for four days.

Day 1
Wear as normal

Day 2
Change feet

Day 3
Turn inside out, and put them back on

Day4
Change feet again

(On the 5th day, sox would automatically find their own way to the laundry...)

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7759 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:55:28 AM »

Popeye was going through customs.
Agent asked "Do you have proof of your identity?"
Popeye replied "Sheriff"
"Ok, you're cleared to pass"
Another agent said "WHA??? .. who is that guy?"
"Are you deaf?.. he said he is Popeye, duh! say, 'Lawman'!"

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7760 on:** June 11, 2018, 11:33:02 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7761 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:39:06 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7762 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:40:14 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7763 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:42:30 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7764 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:43:29 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7765 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:44:15 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7766 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:45:34 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7767 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:46:17 PM »

Bodø Glimt · « **Reply #7768 on:** June 11, 2018, 01:56:27 PM »

I see they granted him his last wish.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7769 on:** June 11, 2018, 02:50:50 PM »

A funny email just in...

Looks official, Telstra logo, etc ... except that it originated from Benin...

.. in the text it is printed as 'Tesltra', and starts off with
"We have ditected that there are some analomies with your account...
Please log in with link below..."

Bad things, them "analomies" ... a good colo-rectal surgeon could correct this?