Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)  (Read 5864118 times)

Online ruSTynutz

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35325 on: August 14, 2021, 09:56:03 AM »
Enjoy your ride, Kev!  :thumbs

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Online Wild Rose

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35326 on: August 14, 2021, 09:57:12 AM »
Have a good ride Kev  :hatwave
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35327 on: August 14, 2021, 01:48:54 PM »
I'm back, just a short cruise and some shopping in Warrnambool and Hamilton, and then home again.
Just under 300km, only a short fizz.  :hatwave :runyay
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35328 on: August 14, 2021, 01:49:44 PM »
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35329 on: August 14, 2021, 01:51:06 PM »
No big deal... crap happens every day

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35330 on: August 14, 2021, 01:53:08 PM »
1999: kids sneak out to drink
2010: kids sneak out to smoke weed
2021: kids sneak out to get vaccinated
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35331 on: August 14, 2021, 01:53:52 PM »
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35332 on: August 14, 2021, 01:57:08 PM »
When someone you don't like falls off their bike....

Ask thoughtfully, "Oh gee! I hope the bike is ok?"
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35333 on: August 14, 2021, 01:59:14 PM »
Starbucks has sponsored a Paul McCartney song.

'Latte it Be!'

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35334 on: August 14, 2021, 02:04:37 PM »
There were two Catholic Boys, Timothy Murphy and Antonio Secola, whose lives paralleled each other in amazing ways.
In the same year Timothy was born in Ireland, Antonio was born in Italy.
Faithfully they attended parochial school from kindergarten through their Senior year in high school. They took their vows to enter the priesthood early in college and upon graduation became priests.
Their careers had come to amaze the world; but, it was generally acknowledged that Antonio was just a cut above Timothy in all respects. Their rise through the ranks of Bishop, Archbishop and finally Cardinal was meteoric to say the least, and the Catholic world knew that when the present Pope died, it would be either Timothy or Antonio who would become the next Pope.

In time the Pope did die, and the College of Cardinals went to work.
In less time than anyone had expected, white smoke rose from the chimney, and the world waited to see who they had chosen.
The world, Catholic, Protestant and secular was surprised to learn that Timothy Murphy had been elected Pope!

Antonio was beyond surprised, he was devastated, because even with all Timothy's gifts, Antonio knew he was the better qualified.
With gall that shocked the Cardinals, Antonio asked for a private session with them in which he candidly asked, "Why Timothy?"
After a long silence, one old Cardinal took pity on the bewildered Antonio and rose to reply:
"We all knew you were the better qualified, but we just could not bear the thought of the leader of the Roman Catholic Church being called 'Pope Secola'

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35335 on: August 14, 2021, 02:10:43 PM »
Not Quite As Romantic As Envisioned

Every girl dreams of being swept off of her feet and carried out of her wedding venue on the big night. Maybe not quite like this, though.

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35336 on: August 14, 2021, 02:40:54 PM »
People always say: 'You're a comedian, tell us a joke.'

They don't say: 'You're an MP, tell us a lie.

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35337 on: August 14, 2021, 02:45:36 PM »
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35338 on: August 14, 2021, 04:24:53 PM »
My wife said: 'Can my mother come down for the weekend?'

So I said: 'Why?'

And she said: 'Well, she's been up on the roof for two weeks already'.

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35339 on: August 14, 2021, 04:26:40 PM »
Don't use pickled onions for a ping pong game.

You'll get a volley of the Dills.

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35340 on: August 14, 2021, 04:56:04 PM »
Styrene and static ....

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Online Wild Rose

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35341 on: August 14, 2021, 06:06:29 PM »
I'm back, just a short cruise and some shopping in Warrnambool and Hamilton, and then home again.
Just under 300km, only a short fizz.  :hatwave :runyay

So Kev
How did it go
Happy  :thumb or   :-[
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35342 on: August 14, 2021, 06:21:17 PM »
Brilliant, Leo. Was comfortable weather, not much traffic, and bike purring like a sewing machine.

Been 1mm of showers since I got home, with some more coming this evening.
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Online Wild Rose

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35343 on: August 14, 2021, 07:03:07 PM »
That's great Kev  :hatwave
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Online ruSTynutz

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35344 on: August 14, 2021, 07:14:42 PM »

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35345 on: August 14, 2021, 07:17:01 PM »
 :rofl
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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35346 on: August 14, 2021, 07:17:51 PM »
The Royal Shakespeare Company once did 'Julius Caesar' in New York.

When Caesar was stabbed onstage, half the audience left because they didn't want to get involved.

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35347 on: August 14, 2021, 07:36:41 PM »
As a teenager, I liked sneaking into girls rooms and rummaging through their drawers to see what I could find.

Most of the girls kicked them off, so I didn't have to search blindly.
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Online ruSTynutz

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35348 on: August 14, 2021, 09:43:42 PM »

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Offline Kev Murphy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone)
« Reply #35349 on: August 15, 2021, 12:56:44 AM »
A philosopher asks a question to his student: "Who is smarter, the common cat or the loyal dog?"
The students looks confused and responds with another question: "Can you give me context, teacher?"
The wise philosopher nodded. "There once was an owner with a cat and a dog. He died. Because there was no more food given by the owner, the cat and the dog were left hungry and alone. The cat, having no karmic regret, escaped the house in search of another owner. The dog however, stayed in place waiting for its owner to wake up, and inevitably starved to death."
The student paled, aghast at the sad tale. But, he responded to the original question. "Teacher, the cat is smarter. The preservation of life is far more important to animals than human values. This is my answer."
The supreme philosopher stared hard at the student and simply stated: "Wrong."
"What?" the student said, shocked. "Why is the dog smarter?"
The ever ingenious philosopher let out a hearty laugh. "It's because... the owner lived in china."
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