A divorced lady in her early 40's, out for a walk in the countryside, stumbles over an oddly shaped bottle. Picking it up and rubbing it lightly to see what it is, there’s a puff of smoke and a pixie appears from the bottle neck.
"Wow, that’s a relief,” says the pixie, “I’ve been in there ages. Your legs look tired. How about I give those muscles a rub?”
I don’t think so, she says, "How about giving me my youthful looks back again.”
The little man shakes his head, "Sorry, I can't do that. But sit on that rock over there and I can work wonders on those calves.”
She declines. "How about making me slimmer, with some curves in the right places?"
"Sorry, no can do." he replies, "But how about a relaxing shoulder rub?"
“How about finding me a caring, thoughtful, handsome man, then?”
"I can’t do that either, but my back rubs are just delightful,” he offers.
Annoyed she gives him a glare, "What is it with you? I ask 3 wishes, you can't grant any. What kind of a genie are you?"
"Hey, who said I'm a genie?" says the little man, "I'm a massage in a bottle."