H took the plunge and went through the river and right up to the soldiers with no effort. Following his lead, I crossed the river, but just as I exited, bang! The front wheel hit a bowling ball size rock hidden in the soft shingle. The front end of my bike reared up and, as I fell backward, my hand pulled throttle open wide. My bike was suddenly going skyward- but what goes up, must come down. I landed in a boulder-strewn field a good 5O yards from where I started. I landed with me under my bike, whose engine was screaming while petrol leaked onto me with enthusiasm. I could just reach the ignition to kill the engine.
Realising I was trapped, but unharmed, my major concern was that as my leg was twisted underneath the bike, someone would just lift it up, and that would break it! I could now hear all the soldiers running down to help.
I shouted as hard as I could, "For God's sake H, don't let them lift the bike," while Henry did a fantastic Kirk Douglas impersonation and bounced from one giant boulder top to another- and reached me before anyone else. I explained to Henry how I wanted them to lift the bike slowly, so I could corkscrew myself round as they lifted. A dozen pairs of hands slowly eased my bike off me as I untangled myself.
Free of the bike, I breathed a great sigh of relief. A dozen excited soldiers manhandled my bike up to their command post. Once I reached the top and they realised I was totally unharmed, laughing and punching my body armour, they started doing impressions of Superman and me going skyward. The commander appeared with a bottle of vodka and three glasses; handing me and H a glass, he looked me in the eye, flashed a gold-tooth smile and said in broken English: "Stuntman." Filling our glasses, we raised them. The toast?
"Hooray for Hollywood."
The Moment Collectors- Asia Sam Manicom and Friends p289