Author Topic: Old Bessie and the Farmer  (Read 2344 times)

Offline Sabie

  • Riding a Blue Angel
  • Supreme "2000" Club Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2757
  • Thanked: 194 times
Old Bessie and the Farmer
« on: October 08, 2012, 01:45:43 AM »
A farmer named Angus had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.

In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Angus.

'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor.
Angus responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I'd just loaded my fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da... '

'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?'

Angus said, 'Well, I'd just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin' down da road.... '

The solicitor interrupted again and said,'Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question. '

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Angus' answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie'.

Angus thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav'rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin' her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin' and groanin'. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.

Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin' and groanin' too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, 'How are you feelin'?'

'Now wot would you say?'
(Sabie pronounced Sab bee)

2004 Honda ST1300 Blue (Current)
2007 Yamaha VStar XVS 650 Classic (Current)
2011 Suzuki Boulevard C50T VL 800
2007 Yamaha XV 250 Virago
1980 CX500 Red
1980 CX500 Black
1979 CX500 Blue
1981 Honda XL 500s
1982 Yamaha XZ 550
1981 Honda XL 250s
1974 Honda Elsinore MT 250
 

Online STeveo

  • Legendary "1000 Club" Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1655
  • Thanked: 417 times
  • ST Legend
Re: Old Bessie and the Farmer
« Reply #1 on: October 08, 2012, 07:49:13 AM »
 :rofl :crackup
 

Offline Tipsy

  • Landed Gentry
  • Legendary "1000 Club" Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1347
  • Thanked: 53 times
  • Laurie
Re: Old Bessie and the Farmer
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2012, 09:41:14 AM »
 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl

Yep Im fine 2

Tipsy
I am lost and haves gone to find myself
Now If I get back before I return
Please ask me to wait.
 

Offline Poppy Dave

  • Teller of Untellable Jokes
  • Legendary "1000 Club" Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1289
  • Thanked: 10 times
  • Midland, WA
    • Dave Roper
Re: Old Bessie and the Farmer
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2012, 05:55:03 PM »
 :crackup :crackup :crackup :rofl :rofl :rofl
Dave R
Honda ST1100A
Suzuki Boulevard C50
STOC # 8241
SAC-PAV A/501

We know why dogs stick their heads out of car windows.