Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and await death when all of a sudden Luis says . . .
"Hey, Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk."
"Ees, Luis, eet sure smell like bacon."
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, and there in the distance is a tree loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double-smoked bacon . . . every imaginable kind of cured pork.
"Pepe, Pepe, wees saved! Ees a bacon tree!"
"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? Wees in the desert, don't forget."
"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon? Ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree!"
And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath . . .
"Pepe . . . Go back, man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"
"Luis, Luis, MI amigo . . . what ees it?"
"Pepe . . . ees not a bacon tree. Ees . . .
Ees . . .
Ees . . .
Ees . . .
Ees . . .
Ees . . .
Ees . . . a ham bush . . ."
SORRY.
I know there's something wrong with me for sending you this. Just couldn't help it! Little voices made me do it !!!
And I bet you tried to do the accent too, didn't you - I know you did!
You're grinning . . . aren't you! He-he-he . . .
