Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...  (Read 77131 times)

Offline spanner

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #50 on: March 27, 2015, 12:47:05 PM »
 :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #51 on: March 30, 2015, 08:17:12 PM »
French tolerance towards Muslims... Street singer in France :rofl

The general opinion is the "singer" is a Romany (gypsy) rather than a Muslim.
It might be a fake, anyway.
The French translates to "Patience and time do more than power and rage". Not sure who's making what point.
Does make the assailant look like a bully who doesn't like his public mobile phone convos compromised.
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline spanner

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #52 on: March 31, 2015, 09:30:29 AM »
I tend to agree Biggles .... has nothing to do with Islam.
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I acknowledge the Bindal and Wulgurukaba traditional custodians of this Australian land that I work, live and play on, and pay my respect to their cultures, their ancestors and to the elders, past, present and all future generations.
 

Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #53 on: March 31, 2015, 03:37:19 PM »
An update on the Volvo joke.  :thumb
 

Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #54 on: March 31, 2015, 03:54:42 PM »
An update on the Volvo joke.  :thumb

Now that the Volvo image has changed.  Many are sporty.
These days the "hats" are seen in Corollas and small Hyundais.  The better off are in Honda Civics. 
They're certainly spoiled for choice compared with 20 years ago!
Pick 'em from a mile off by the hat on the rear shelf and the rapid closing speed as you approach from behind. 
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #55 on: April 01, 2015, 11:01:00 AM »
well, it IS the first of April?  :grin

You definitely need more sleep!
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Online Wild Rose

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #56 on: April 05, 2015, 06:43:28 AM »
 :clap :clap :clap ++
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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #57 on: April 05, 2015, 07:37:19 AM »
A 75-year-old woman went to the doctor for a check-up.

The doctor told her she needed more activity and recommended sex three times a week. She said to the doctor: “Please, tell my husband”.

The doctor goes out in the waiting room and tells the husband that his wife needs to have sex three times a week.

The 80 year old husband replies, “Which days?”

The doctor says, “How about Monday, Wednesday and Friday”.

The husband says, “I can bring her Monday and Wednesday, but on Fridays she’ll have to take the bus”.
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #58 on: April 07, 2015, 11:37:49 PM »
Had me scratching my head what was going on.  I could see a cat laying on its back on a patterned carpet beside an open drawer.
Then I saw the cornice where a skirting board should be and then I wondered how the cat got up there.
I can understand it wanting to be as far away as possible while its master posts dodgy pix and jokes on forums...    :grin

Have you downloaded "Dallas Buyers Club" Ken?  Did you see tonight's TV news?  Are you with TPG?     :eek
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline Lionel

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #59 on: April 08, 2015, 09:46:34 AM »
The potential cost is more than $10 or $40 being the cost of a DVD.
Usually, the loser in a civil court action is ordered to pay the legal costs of both parties.  :H
 

Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #60 on: April 10, 2015, 10:02:20 AM »
I get to deal with the Insinkerators (as Emerson, the manufacturer calls them) fairly often in my biz.
If you'r lucky it's a nice clean spoon.  More often it's too disgusting for gloves.  If it's getting corroded (as they do after 15 years in service) I bin it.  They're $215 and the owner can start all over feeding it the wrong diet.
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

OzSTOC #16  STOC #6135  FarR #509  IBA #54927
 

Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #61 on: April 14, 2015, 07:03:53 PM »
 :rofl
 

Offline alans1100

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #62 on: April 14, 2015, 07:18:05 PM »
In a similar vein Heather rang DoDO this morning to cancel the broadband modem that we've used maybe three times in three years. They tried to convince her to keep it as $9.90 a month wasn't much. Well, if that isn't much money then they won't miss it; will they? While still on the phone they sent her a text asking her to ring them in relation to the query that she was the phone for.
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #63 on: April 14, 2015, 09:23:16 PM »

You have heard of 'Light and Easy?'  ... I  think I must be Heavy and Difficult.


Nah.  Old and grumpy.
I'm your understudy.
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #64 on: April 23, 2015, 08:14:48 AM »
 :rofl
 

Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #65 on: April 23, 2015, 10:06:39 AM »
Whoa!  That was an engineering feat!  Wonderful how it all came together for him.   :grin
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #66 on: April 23, 2015, 01:54:20 PM »
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

"That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

"Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework."Oh, mercy me! she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with
Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.
This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you
for shopping at the Husband Store. (scroll and keep reading!)

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited!
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #67 on: April 23, 2015, 02:50:00 PM »
Apparently our needs are less.     :grin

But I'd like to go to the fifth floor if I could afford it.     :thumb
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #68 on: April 23, 2015, 05:06:07 PM »
You'll never get rich in their get-rich-quick schemes if you're going to be childish!!    :-(((
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #69 on: April 23, 2015, 06:45:56 PM »
According to a phonecall just received from 'Michael' from Microsoft, my computer is doing bad things on the internet. 'Michael' says that they are monitoring their server, which is servicing the entire world wide web for malware, (WOW!) and my computer is being infected with a 'trojan virus' which is disrupting the Internet, and if I do not let them be fixing it for a small modest sum then they will be banning me from the internet immediately henceforth forthwith!


I asked 'Michael' ... "What's a computer?" .. and he got all flustered and hung up.

 Damn.... and I was ready to play, too!

I tell them I have a Mac . . They're gone very quickly . .
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #70 on: April 24, 2015, 06:13:16 PM »
Murphy's Law for Motorcyclists (stolen from another site, but good nonetheless):

It’s said that anything that can go wrong will go wrong. Known as Murphy’s Law it definitely applies to motorcycles and riding too. Here are some of the things that you hope will never happen on a motorcycle but somehow you know that they always will.

1. It’s a fact of life that a motorcycle cannot fall over without an audience. The odds of a motorcycle falling over are directly proportional to the number of people watching and the rider’s ego. If the motorcycle is new and expensive then the chances of this happening are even greater.

2. The chances of your helmet dropping to the concrete or asphalt is directly linked to how new it is and how much you paid for it.

3. The time your motorcycle is most likely to stall at a set of lights or intersection is approximately half a second after making eye contact with an attractive stranger.

4. You've just ridden through a thunderstorm. The rain was so heavy that you had to pull over to find somewhere to sit it out. Finally the sun has come out and you and your gear are now dry so you can set off. Five km down the road it starts to rain again.

5. The chances of you riding in the rain is directly related to how accessible your gear is, or if you have remembered to bring it with you in the first place.

6. If the weather looks threatening and you stop to put on your rain gear, it won't rain. If you don't, it will come down in torrents.

7. If you run out of fuel it doesn't matter which direction you push your bike, the nearest servo will always be uphill and in the opposite direction. The odds are increased that all nearby servos are closed.

8. The battery on your bike will die at the exact same time as something else breaks leading you to think for the next two weeks that the two things are somehow connected.

9. Nothing on this planet is harder to start than a used motorcycle being shown to prospective buyer. This is despite the bike firing up and running like a dream five minutes before the potential purchaser arrived.

10. You will never have a puncture on the road until you leave the repair kit at home in your garage.

11. The chances of finding accommodation while out on the road are directly related to how late in the day it is and what the weather is like. If it’s dark and raining you’re going to be riding a long time before you find anything suitable.

12. You've spent weeks in a parking lot practicing how to do a wheelie on your bike. You've now got it down to a fine art and know exactly what you are doing. First time you attempt it out on the road you pass a cop. He also happens to dislike motorcyclists.

13. You will inevitably find a gem of a country road with no traffic, beautiful scenery, excellent sweepers - and wildlife on the road.

14. When something goes wrong on your bike it will always happen in the sketchiest part of town or in the furthest, out of the way part of the country.

15. The one and only part that you really, really need for your motorcycle will be the only item that is on permanent back-order. How long it takes to eventually arrive is also proportional to how badly you want it.
 
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Previous bikes1948 Triumph Tiger 500 Twin - sprung rear hub, 1963 BSA Bantam 175, Yamaha 75cc & DT250, Honda ST1100, 400N & CX500 sports, BMW K100RS & K100 LT, Harley Electra-glid
 

Offline JuST Peter

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #71 on: April 24, 2015, 08:05:13 PM »
Murphys' Law as applied to myself...

I bought a shockproof, waterproof, fully automatic electronic Swiss incabloc movement digital divers watch....














Naturally, .. it caught fire.


...and if it was raining women, I would probably get washed down the drain with some gay guy...

I thought you were going to say you rode over it  :grin
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Offline Brock

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #72 on: April 26, 2015, 03:58:37 PM »
 :well :well :well
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Offline Brock

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #73 on: April 26, 2015, 04:12:51 PM »
Wot you need is a norty corner Gif Kev...
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Offline Brock

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #74 on: April 26, 2015, 04:28:29 PM »
I will let you come up with something, you are the creative one.... ;-*

(besides, it may keep you busy for a few minutes)
Brock
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