Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...  (Read 77120 times)

Offline Brock

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #100 on: June 15, 2015, 05:43:42 PM »
WAy too much time on your hands Kev...

Not bad but :beer
Brock
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #101 on: June 15, 2015, 06:23:05 PM »
Quote
WAy too much time on your hands Kev...

That barely describes it!  448 frames individually coloured!  Sheesh, I thought it was corny in B&W.      :grin
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #102 on: June 16, 2015, 09:55:52 AM »
That's a helluva lot of corn!
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #103 on: June 18, 2015, 08:09:47 PM »
Funneee
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #104 on: June 18, 2015, 08:20:09 PM »
The Courts said that she was entitled to half....

https://au.news.yahoo.com/a/28493367/bitter-ex-literally-puts-half-his-stuff-on-ebay/

Whooo!  That guy is really into revenge!

It's also described as "cutting off your nose to spite your face".
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

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Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #105 on: June 23, 2015, 06:22:33 PM »
AW, Gee whiz!... PayPal has suspended my non-existent account AGAIN! .. this is 4 times in 6 months!
(I don't have a credit card, how could it be linked to my non-account?)

PayPal  Today at 12:35 PM
Dеаг Vаluеd ΡауΡаl Customег,
Οuг ѕесuгіtу ѕуѕtеm dеtесtеd unuѕuаl сhагgеѕ tο а сгеdіt-сагd lіnkеd tο уοuг ΡауΡаl ассοunt.
Сuггеntlу, уοuг ассοunt hаѕ bееn lіmіtеd duе tο thе fοllοwіng геаѕοn:
  Ѕuѕρісіοuѕ асtіνіtіеѕ hаѕ tгіggегеd οuг ѕесuгіtу ѕуѕtеm whісh ѕhοwѕ thаt аn unаuthοгіzеd uѕег
tгіеd tο ассеѕѕ уοuг ΡауΡаl ассοunt wіthοut уοuг сοnѕеnt. Тο еnѕuге gгеаtег ѕесuгіtу, wе hаνе
lіmіtеd ассеѕѕ tο уοuг ассοunt. Wе hаνе ѕеnt уοu аn аttасhmеnt сοntаіnіng thе nесеѕѕагу ѕtеρѕ
іn οгdег tο геѕtοге уοuг ассοunt ассеѕѕ. Ѕіmρlу dοwnlοаd аnd νіеw іt іn уοuг wеЬ Ьгοwѕег.
  Ρlеаѕе dο undегѕtаnd thаt thіѕ іѕ а ѕесuгіtу mеаѕuге іntеndеd tο ρгοtесt уοu аnd уοuг
ассοunt. Wе аροlοgіzе fοг аnу іnсοnνеnіеnсе.

Тhаnk уοu,
ΡауΡаl Αссοunt Rеνіеw Team
Had that one a few times. First time the phrasing was not quite right so I went to my paypal account through the normal channel and surprise, surprise, all is normal. Another scam I've had is they send you an incorrect invoice for someone else and ask you to log in to correct the 'mistake'. Bloody wankers!
 

Offline Flip

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #106 on: June 24, 2015, 01:49:23 AM »
AW, Gee whiz!... PayPal has suspended my non-existent account AGAIN! .. this is 4 times in 6 months!
(I don't have a credit card, how could it be linked to my non-account?)

PayPal  Today at 12:35 PM
Dеаг Vаluеd ΡауΡаl Customег,
Οuг ѕесuгіtу ѕуѕtеm dеtесtеd unuѕuаl сhагgеѕ tο а сгеdіt-сагd lіnkеd tο уοuг ΡауΡаl ассοunt.
Сuггеntlу, уοuг ассοunt hаѕ bееn lіmіtеd duе tο thе fοllοwіng геаѕοn:
  Ѕuѕρісіοuѕ асtіνіtіеѕ hаѕ tгіggегеd οuг ѕесuгіtу ѕуѕtеm whісh ѕhοwѕ thаt аn unаuthοгіzеd uѕег
tгіеd tο ассеѕѕ уοuг ΡауΡаl ассοunt wіthοut уοuг сοnѕеnt. Тο еnѕuге gгеаtег ѕесuгіtу, wе hаνе
lіmіtеd ассеѕѕ tο уοuг ассοunt. Wе hаνе ѕеnt уοu аn аttасhmеnt сοntаіnіng thе nесеѕѕагу ѕtеρѕ
іn οгdег tο геѕtοге уοuг ассοunt ассеѕѕ. Ѕіmρlу dοwnlοаd аnd νіеw іt іn уοuг wеЬ Ьгοwѕег.
  Ρlеаѕе dο undегѕtаnd thаt thіѕ іѕ а ѕесuгіtу mеаѕuге іntеndеd tο ρгοtесt уοu аnd уοuг
ассοunt. Wе аροlοgіzе fοг аnу іnсοnνеnіеnсе.

Тhаnk уοu,
ΡауΡаl Αссοunt Rеνіеw Team
Had that one a few times. First time the phrasing was not quite right so I went to my paypal account through the normal channel and surprise, surprise, all is normal. Another scam I've had is they send you an incorrect invoice for someone else and ask you to log in to correct the 'mistake'. Bloody wankers!

YEP !    Same - same here.  Got the same 'Paypal' email a couple of days ago.

LOVE to be able to somehow send whoever a nasty virus or something like that.

Sent a copy off to PayPal and got their usual 'form' email back this morning.

When I get that US $14 million in my bank account from the lovely bank manager in Nigeria, (or was it South Africa ???) might use some of the $14 million to hire someone to hunt down these scammers and break their keyboards.

Flip

 :wht11
« Last Edit: June 24, 2015, 02:09:26 AM by Flip »
But I AM Napoleon I tell you !
Where am I now that I need me ???
ALL others on the roads are idiots - ride accordingly !
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Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #107 on: June 24, 2015, 07:41:15 AM »
 :crackup
 

Offline spanner

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #108 on: June 25, 2015, 03:50:56 PM »
you should have sent them the address at the Lodge in Canberra.
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Online StinkyPete

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #109 on: June 25, 2015, 08:44:11 PM »
It was so cold in Adelaide today that the politicians had their hands in their own pockets.
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Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #110 on: June 26, 2015, 10:30:22 AM »
 :crackup :thumbsup
 

Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #111 on: June 28, 2015, 07:08:05 PM »
Be a bit of a mouthful.  :whistle
 

Offline ppopeye

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #112 on: June 28, 2015, 07:12:13 PM »



Sent from my iPad
ppopeye

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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #113 on: June 30, 2015, 09:50:28 PM »
ZEN  TEACHINGS

1.  Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow.. In fact, just piss off and leave me alone.

2.  Sex is like air. It's not that important unless you aren't getting any.

3.  No one is listening until you fart.

4.  Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.

5.  Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

6.  If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.

7.  Before you criticise someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticise them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

8..  If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

9.  Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

10. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.

11. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

12. Some days you are the dog,  some days you are the tree.

13. Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.

14. Good judgment comes from bad experience ... and most of that comes from bad judgment.               

15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

16. There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.

17. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

18. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

19. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our ass - then things just keep getting worse..

20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Current bikes 2013 Triumph Trophy SE, 2008 ST1300, BMW F700GS
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Offline STeveo

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #114 on: July 04, 2015, 07:47:14 AM »
 :-++
 

Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #115 on: July 04, 2015, 12:57:47 PM »
While shopping, I spotted a girl with a safety pin through her eyebrow!


...I didn't know that eyebrows could fall off?

Nah.  It's so she knows where to start the cosmetics application in the morning.
She's so "off her face" she needs a marker.     |-i          :grin
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

OzSTOC #16  STOC #6135  FarR #509  IBA #54927
 
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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #116 on: July 17, 2015, 09:01:26 PM »
 
The lawyer says to the wealthy art collector tycoon:  "I have some good news, and I have some bad news.

The tycoon replies:  "I’ve had an awful day, let's hear the good news first.

The lawyer says:  “Your wife invested $5,000 in two pictures today that she figures are worth a minimum of $2 million.”

The tycoon replies enthusiastically:  “Well done, very good news indeed!  You've just made my day; now what’s the bad news?”

The lawyer answers :  “ The pictures are of you and your secretary .”
 
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Current bikes 2013 Triumph Trophy SE, 2008 ST1300, BMW F700GS
Previous bikes1948 Triumph Tiger 500 Twin - sprung rear hub, 1963 BSA Bantam 175, Yamaha 75cc & DT250, Honda ST1100, 400N & CX500 sports, BMW K100RS & K100 LT, Harley Electra-glid
 
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Offline Brock

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #117 on: July 22, 2015, 08:29:43 PM »
The post that was here has gone bye bye.

Possibly a bit too norty    :OldMan :well :well
Brock
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Offline WendyL

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #118 on: July 23, 2015, 05:28:22 PM »
Kev, I missed it.  If it was too norty for Brock I need to see it.  Can you please PM it to me?  :crackup
:KissBlow
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #119 on: July 23, 2015, 06:08:28 PM »
Kev, I missed it.  If it was too norty for Brock I need to see it.  Can you please PM it to me?  :crackup

Nah.  It was only politically naughty.  Or very norty if you're a Bronnie B fan.
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

OzSTOC #16  STOC #6135  FarR #509  IBA #54927
 

Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #120 on: July 23, 2015, 08:48:54 PM »
A woman walks into the Frankston Centrelink office, trailed by 15 kids...

"WOW," the social worker exclaims, "Are they ALL yours?

"Yeah they are all mine," the flustered mother sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before.

She says, "Sit down Terry." All the children rush to find seats.

"Well," says the social worker, "then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names."

"This one's my oldest - he is Terry."

"OK, and who's next?"

"Well, this one he is Terry, also."

The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the oldest four, all boys, all named Terry.

Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Terri.

"All right," says the caseworker. "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL named Terri?

Their Mother replied, "Well, yes-it makes it easier. When it is time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, 'Terry!' An' when it's time for dinner, I just yell 'Terry!' an' they all come runnin.' An' if I need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just yell "Terry" and all of them stop. It's the smartest idea I ever had, namin' them all Terry."

The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, "But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch

"I call them by their surnames!"
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Current bikes 2013 Triumph Trophy SE, 2008 ST1300, BMW F700GS
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Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #121 on: July 24, 2015, 06:33:00 PM »

Dear Tech Support
 
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend to Husband and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend.

In addition, Husband un-installed many other valuable programmes, such as Romance and Personal Attention and then installed undesirable programs such as Rugby, Football, Sailing and Continuous TV.
Conversation no longer runs, and Housecleaning simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging to fix these problems, but to no avail.
 
What can I do?
 
Signed, Desperate housewife



Dear Desperate housewife,
 
First keep in mind, Boyfriend is an Entertainment Package, while Husband is an Operating System.
Please enter the command: 'http: I Thought You Loved Me.html' and try to download Tears.

Don't forget to install the Guilt update.

If that application works as designed, Husband should then automatically run the applications Jewellery and Flowers, but remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband to default to Grumpy Silence, Garden Shed or Beer.

Beer is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband.
 
In summary, Husband is a great system, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. It also tends to work better running one task at a time.

You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.

We recommend Food and Hot Lingerie.
 
Good Luck,
Tech Support.
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
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Current bikes 2013 Triumph Trophy SE, 2008 ST1300, BMW F700GS
Previous bikes1948 Triumph Tiger 500 Twin - sprung rear hub, 1963 BSA Bantam 175, Yamaha 75cc & DT250, Honda ST1100, 400N & CX500 sports, BMW K100RS & K100 LT, Harley Electra-glid
 
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Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #122 on: July 25, 2015, 11:47:48 AM »
Probably too true to be funny!
Still.  Wouldn't want to go behind bars.  Too hard to get a ride done!
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

OzSTOC #16  STOC #6135  FarR #509  IBA #54927
 

Offline Biggles

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #123 on: July 26, 2015, 05:44:49 PM »
Nothing that wouldn't be solved by a rapid upwards fling of the right hand.     |-i
For the modern man who lives in the city, riding a bike might be one of the only ways to escape the humdrum monotony. To take off and ride. To be both at one with nature and one with the bike. To feel masculine. Adam Piggott

OzSTOC #16  STOC #6135  FarR #509  IBA #54927
 

Offline STroppy

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Re: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll...
« Reply #124 on: July 26, 2015, 09:05:04 PM »
How are the forks Kev? All back together, bike ride OK now?
Terry, Canberra 0412499625
Ulysses #22354,
Current bikes 2013 Triumph Trophy SE, 2008 ST1300, BMW F700GS
Previous bikes1948 Triumph Tiger 500 Twin - sprung rear hub, 1963 BSA Bantam 175, Yamaha 75cc & DT250, Honda ST1100, 400N & CX500 sports, BMW K100RS & K100 LT, Harley Electra-glid