In Medieval Europe, there once was a triangular lake.
This triangular lake was quite large; so large, in fact, that three separate kingdoms were built on each side of this lake. These kingdoms were very different one from another.
The first kingdom was the richest - smooth stone walls built like a fortress, lavish houses for all, and a generous king who made the lives of his townsfolk quite enjoyable. They had want for nothing, for they had many riches.
The second kingdom wasn't as fine - its outer walls of cobblestone and wood held the middle-class villagers, who had to slap on some elbow grease once in a while to get things done.
But the third kingdom was the most desolate of all - rotting walls of wood housed the peasants, farmers and slaves. Ridden with disease and dirt, one's dream house would be anywhere but here.
One day, the king of the first kingdom decides he wants the lake, for it is a valuable resource, and so he wages war on the other two kingdoms over the lake; winner takes all.
For such a war, the first kingdom sends out a hundred war-trained knights clad in the finest steel armor you've ever seen with polished swords and armored stallions of battle. To accompany them, a squire is assigned to each knight to tend to his every need, no matter how demanding.
The second kingdom, since they're not as wealthy as the first, sends out fifty knights with top-notch leather armor and a few horses, as well as two dozen squires for the lot.
The third kingdom sends out its only warrior with the suit of armor his father passed down to him when he died of smallpox. Seeing as said warrior is quite elderly, they task their king's only squire to him to aid him in his endeavours.
The night before the battle, the first kingdom's knights have a huge party. They get drunk off their asses with wine and mead, and everyone has one hell of a night.
The second kingdom's knights don't have such luxuries, so they sit around a large fire with pints of ale and recount battle-won victories of the past, with the squires offering music and dancing for entertainment.
The third kingdom's lone knight decides he's not in the mood to party since he's way past 50, and has a small beer before nodding off under a tree. The squire makes him beef stew in a pot, and hoists it up in the tree with a noose around a thick branch to consume it for breakfast before their battle.
The sun rises, roosters crow, and the knights awaken. The first kingdom's knights all have head-splitting migraines from their hangovers; the second kingdom's knights aren't doing that well either; the third kingdom's knight slept in. They collectively decide that no one's in the mood to wield a sword and kill anyone, so the three kingdoms send their squires out to battle. And what a battle! Blood was spilled, skulls were shattered, enemies were slain, and against all odds, the lone survivor of this massacre was the lone squire from the third kingdom. As was agreed by the three kings, the third kingdom was given the lake.
I suppose it goes to show that the squire of the high-pot-and-noose is equal to the squires of its two opposing sides.
