Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 3183577 times)

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14375 on:** October 06, 2019, 07:13:13 PM »

On a completely different subject, I finally convinced my buddy to start doing online surveys a week and a half ago.
I currently have $280 in my account, after redeeming $70 this morning. (Can only get a max of $70 every 60 days)
Hey, thats $420 dollars per year in instalments, paid directly into my bank!

Back to my mate... he was rubbing his hands together today, now has $32 in his account from just the past ten days.
If anyone is interested in getting some free tanks of fuel, or the bike rego paid, just for a few minutes of key tapping per day, here is the link.

https://referral.pureprofile.com/referrer/Njk2OTM1NDEz3

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14376 on:** October 06, 2019, 07:32:49 PM »

A woman and her 9 years old son were inside a Taxi. It was raining and all the twilight girls were standing by the roadside.

The Boy asked; "Mummy, what are all those women doing?."

His Mother replied; "They are waiting for their husbands to come home from work."

The Taxi driver turned around and said; "Why don't you tell him the truth?.
Little boy, they are prostitutes, they sleep with men for money."

The Boy's eyes got wide and asked; "Mummy is that true?"

His mother, glaring hard at the driver replied; "Yes.!!"

After a few minutes, the boy asked; "Mummy, what happens to the babies those women have?."

She replied; "Most of them become Taxi drivers."

Shillas · « **Reply #14377 on:** October 06, 2019, 08:24:06 PM »

Shillas · « **Reply #14378 on:** October 06, 2019, 08:25:06 PM »

Quote from: Bodø on October 06, 2019, 06:59:16 PM

Phone - did itself

Tablet -same

House clocks - manually adjusted

Bike - left as is

Bike's dashcam - left as is

Mobius camera - left as is

Gopro - left as is

Digital camera - left as is

Computer - time zone is set to Darwin so it matches all my cameras.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14379 on:** October 06, 2019, 08:30:33 PM »

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said that the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14380 on:** October 06, 2019, 08:32:18 PM »

The Bengal Tiger is capable of jumping higher than an average two story colonial house.

This is because of their powerful hind legs, and the fact that the average 2 story colonial home can't jump at all.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14381 on:** October 06, 2019, 08:42:47 PM »

I'm thinking of starting a new liquor brand, and have an idea on how to get free advertising and promotion from all the other major labels.

I'm going to name it "Responsibly"

Bodø · « **Reply #14382 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:04:37 AM »

Quote from: Kev Murphy on October 06, 2019, 08:32:18 PM

The Bengal Tiger is capable of jumping higher than an average two story colonial house.

This is because of their powerful hind legs, and the fact that the average 2 story colonial home can't jump at all.

Haven't you heard of jumping castles?

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14383 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:13:38 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14384 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:53:25 AM »

Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche, and posted on Facebook that I can't wait for the new 911 to arrive.

10000 random Muslims have now added me as a friend.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14385 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:57:34 AM »

My dad gave me money to pay the electricity bill, but instead, I bought a lottery ticket for a brand new car.
When I got home, I explained to dad what I did, and he beat the crap out of me.

But the next day, when my dad woke up and opened the door, outside my house was a brand new car.

We all cried especially me, because the car was from the electricity company.

They were there to cut off the power, so my dad beat the crap out of me again.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14386 on:** October 07, 2019, 01:09:00 AM »

A lot of people prefer luxury toilet paper over cheaper brands;

But on the whole, there's not much difference.

... except: soft, super soft, and whoops! - too bloody soft!

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14387 on:** October 07, 2019, 03:31:51 AM »

When social media bans female boobs, but not men's, it shows a real intolerance...

Lactose intolerance?

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14388 on:** October 07, 2019, 03:36:53 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14389 on:** October 07, 2019, 03:46:18 AM »

Bodø · « **Reply #14390 on:** October 07, 2019, 04:02:46 AM »

Quote from: Kev Murphy on October 07, 2019, 03:31:51 AM

When social media bans female boobs, but not men's, it shows a real intolerance...
Lactose intolerance?

Bodø · « **Reply #14391 on:** October 07, 2019, 04:04:11 AM »

Bodø · « **Reply #14392 on:** October 07, 2019, 04:04:20 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14393 on:** October 07, 2019, 10:52:55 AM »

Would a male pirate, who identifies as a female pirate be a ... Transgendaarrrrgh ??

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14394 on:** October 07, 2019, 11:56:21 AM »

Odd text message from a mobile phone.

"Gra was called into work today, wanna pop round for some fun?"

I used reverse phone lookup program, number is listed as being in Wynnum. Too far away to be of any use to me.

So, if you have a mate named Gra, who lives on Tallegalla street, give him a call and tell him to go home?

Or inversely, if you live in the area and have a dull day, I can pass on the phone number and street address.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14395 on:** October 07, 2019, 11:59:49 AM »

I just texted the number back. "Thanks for the offer, but I live in western Victoria."

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14396 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:07:01 PM »

No reply....

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14397 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:16:41 PM »

I had a bad night last night. Three bloody females annoying the crap out of me while I was trying to sleep.

I hate mosquitoes.

Bodø · « **Reply #14398 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:22:04 PM »

They got a buzz out of it.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #14399 on:** October 07, 2019, 12:42:00 PM »

On close inspection, there's a vas deferens between Male and Female genitalia.

News:

Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 3183577 times)

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