Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 5863621 times)

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7350 on:** April 29, 2018, 10:57:48 AM »

Trump said in his campaign "If I voted for Clinton, I would be stuck with a criminal president under constant federal investigation from day one."

Turns out, he was right.

I voted for Clinton, and I'm stuck with a criminal president under federal investigation from day one.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7351 on:** April 29, 2018, 11:06:35 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7352 on:** April 29, 2018, 11:09:29 AM »

Donald Trump decided to take just $1 as his salary for the job of the President, instead of the usual 400,000.

That man wil do anything to avoid paying taxes.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7353 on:** April 29, 2018, 11:15:29 AM »

"I heard that the FBI have foiled a terrorist plot to kill Donald trump."

"What, a suicide bomber? "

"No, a surface to hair missile."

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7354 on:** April 29, 2018, 12:15:58 PM »

The whales are back! ... Usually Southern Right whales here? .. or an occasional Orca?

Portland - Victoria's Whale Watching Capital
Dear Kev Murphy,
1 Humpback Whale spotted at Wade Street lookout heading at pace towards Lee Breakwater.
Sunday 29th April 2018
11:45am

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7355 on:** April 29, 2018, 12:33:08 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7356 on:** April 29, 2018, 12:34:27 PM »

Donald Trump is now president, but the real winner is Melania Trump.

Now she can call herself the First Lady instead of the Third Wife.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7357 on:** April 29, 2018, 12:42:44 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7358 on:** April 29, 2018, 12:46:58 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7359 on:** April 29, 2018, 04:15:35 PM »

When you take a joke too far, it becomes the 45th President of the United States.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7360 on:** April 29, 2018, 07:25:39 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7361 on:** April 29, 2018, 07:26:39 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7362 on:** April 29, 2018, 07:31:27 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7363 on:** April 29, 2018, 07:33:08 PM »

Shillas · « **Reply #7364 on:** April 29, 2018, 08:25:39 PM »

Quote from: Kev Murphy on April 29, 2018, 10:52:04 AM

Would a tall redhead be called a gingeraffe?

No, shortblue.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7365 on:** April 29, 2018, 08:28:01 PM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7366 on:** April 30, 2018, 12:44:41 AM »

As I get older, I remember all the people I've lost along the way.

I think to myself ... maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for me?

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7367 on:** April 30, 2018, 12:46:21 AM »

I have never played the bagpipes .... but I have carried a screaming three-year-old toddler over my shoulder.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7368 on:** April 30, 2018, 12:48:03 AM »

The seven ages of man:

spills,
drills,
thrills,
bills,
ills,
pills
and wills.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7369 on:** April 30, 2018, 12:50:50 AM »

At my last medical check, the Doctor said that I had the body of a 20 year old.

He advised me to return it, as I was stretching it completely out of shape!

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7370 on:** April 30, 2018, 12:53:40 AM »

I have an 8:30 dinner reservation tonight.

That's like 2.30 am in Seniors time.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7371 on:** April 30, 2018, 01:15:57 AM »

Winter is natures way of telling you to polish your bike.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7372 on:** April 30, 2018, 01:21:45 AM »

Last Father's Day, my son gave me something that I have always wanted.

He gave back the keys to my car.

Then he told me it's out of gas, and parked somewhere up the freeway.

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7373 on:** April 30, 2018, 03:48:05 AM »

Kev Murphy · « **Reply #7374 on:** April 30, 2018, 02:41:27 PM »

When you lose an item, the fastest way to find it again is to buy a replacement.

News:

Author Topic: Drugs, Sex, Rock and Roll, mark II. ( content may not suit everyone) (Read 5863621 times)